Single mothers find housing solutions through shared living

For 18 months after her break-up, single mother Hayley Grimmond was finding it impossible to find a secure, long-term rental for her and her young daughter, Blair.

Every week she would send out about three rental applications. She never heard back.

"All I've ever wanted is for my daughter to have the best life I can possibly give her," she explained.

It's an issue many single mothers say they endure: rental discrimination.

Hayley slept on friend's couches and stayed in crisis accommodation.

Her sister helped her with a spare room, but the home was too crowded to be a viable long-term solution.

Hayley's only reprieve was a six-month lease in a one-bedroom apartment.

"I've worked for homeless organisations myself in the past," she said.

"And then when it happened to me, it was a shock, an absolute shock to the system."

It was then her mother suggested she could rent a house with another single mum. She joined a private Facebook group, run by the Council of Single Mothers and Their Children (CSMC), where she met Anja Homburg.

Anja owned a home in Riddles Creek, on the outskirts of Melbourne, but managing the mortgage on a single income, even with her parents' support, was a financial strain.

"The stress was enormous," Anja recalled.

The pair struck up an immediate friendship and soon became housemates.

Their daughters, Blair and Raelia, became close, playing together on the trampoline, exploring the expansive garden, and sharing toys, books and bathtime.

The cost of living became comfortable.

"She is the reason that I'm not counting every single dollar I have," Anja said.

Importantly, the mental load of motherhood was no longer a solo journey, with cleaning, shopping, and even child duties split between them.

"We just really enjoy each other's company."

Single mothers over-represented in poverty statistics

The cost of housing and living has received much media attention in recent years, with the prices for home ownership and rentals surging.

But single mothers are acutely affected.

Nearly one in three single parents live in poverty, almost three times likely than two-parent households, according to the 2023 Household, Income and Labour Dynamics in Australia (HILDA) report from Melbourne University and Department of Social Services.

Women are overwhelmingly represented, making up 85 per cent of single parent families, the report notes.

Single mothers are four times more likely to experience homelessness, a 2023 CSMC national survey found.

That report noted the high prevalence of family violence against single mums, which impacts financial security, and that single mums still do overwhelmingly most unpaid child duties, which impacts employment opportunities.

The organisation's chief executive Jenny Davidson said welfare support falls far below the mark.

"The costs of rents have gone up to the point at which the rent is now 50 per cent, 60 per cent, even 70 per cent of their income," she said.

"It means that mothers are having to make choices like, do you put on the heat in winter, or do you put on the cooling in summer, or do you have enough groceries?

"They're skipping medical appointments."

In recent years, the organisation's "Single Mothers Share House Register" social media page has surged in popularity.

From just a few hundred to currently thousands of active users, it links mums seeking other mums to share a house with.

"Single mothers are at the forefront of policy failures around housing," Ms Davidson said.

"And that's the reason why we see them turning to innovative solutions."

Mums providing each other a 'soft landing'

It's a resource that linked single mums Priscilla Jones with Jenna Wilson, and their kids Leo and Maia.

"It's been amazing," Jenna said.

"The evenings before Cil moved in were quiet and lonely."

For three years, they've shared the mental load of parenting as well as the financial.

Priscilla described it as a "soft landing", ensuring she did not suffer financial stress that burdens many single mums.

"Splitting the cost of rent, splitting the cost of food, the cost of bills means that I had that breathing space to build up my business," Priscilla said.

She's now ready to move out once the lease runs out later this year.

Jenna is turning her eyes to a new venture.

Earlier this year, she set up the enterprise the Lioness Den, which provides mortgage brokering services for single mums.

She's now registering a charity to raise money to buy a small apartment block, where units would be provided for single mums and their kids.

The rental cost would be capped at 30 per cent of income, plus rent assistance, to ensure the apartments do not cause financial stress.

"I've worked in housing and homelessness for about 15 years," she said.

"One place where I was working, the answer was kind of, well, I can give you accommodation for one night in a motel, but then you kind of need to help yourself, which was just ridiculous."

A long-term ambition is to build a bespoke apartment complex, with a community daycare, play centre and shared working space.

"Everything that single mums need to thrive and live together,"

Suitable housing 'beyond reach' for many

Independent economist Nicki Hutley said decades of underfunding public housing, which has led to ballooning wait lists, has been a key driver for single-mum housing stress and poverty.

In more recent years, state governments have prioritised "social" or "community" housing, which mixes "affordable" housing with price caps along with normal apartments for rent or sale.

But the rules governing such spaces are often complex, which disincentivises private investment, and inhibits access for those that need it, she said.

And recent increases in rental support had often resulted in landlords putting up their rent "by the same amount", she added.

"If you're on the lowest income quintile, as a single mum on support, you're just so far removed from being able to afford anything reasonable and not overcrowded," she said.

"It's just beyond reach."

It's not just the mums that are impacted, but their children too, Ms Hutley pointed out.

"Your kids suffer if they don't have adequate space to study," she said.

"Research has shown that they are less likely to complete year 12 at school. That means they're less likely to earn a better income.

"We've screwed up massively."

Be 'clear' on what can work

Shared housing is not without its drawbacks, especially with children involved.

Mums need to ensure their personalities match, as well as their parenting styles.

But for those it does work for, it can provide a wonderful new home for mums and children.

Anja Homburg said its important those considering this path should be "clear" on the home and housemate that matches their lifestyle.

"Be open, I think," she said.

"Be open to things you might not have considered before because sometimes stuff works out better than you expect it's going to.

"But at the same time, be really clear about the things that work for you and the things that won't. And don't rush."

Her housemate Hayley has already decided she wants to stay beyond their initial six-month trial period.

"It's been an absolutely pleasant surprise."