AFL player's partner boycotts Brownlow medal ceremony over league's culture

The partner of one of the AFL’s most prominent players has boycotted next month’s Brownlow medal ceremony, describing the event as one that “doesn’t align” with her values in the wake of the sector’s response to the alleged sexual assault at the Sydney Swans’ team hotel.

Writer Dee Salmin, who also hosts a popular podcast and is the partner of Collingwood’s captain, Darcy Moore, posted to her newsletter on Sunday explaining her decision.

“I’ve spent the past few weeks thinking about the important conversations we’re having about women and the culture surrounding AFL, and I’ve realised I can’t keep encouraging other people to interrogate the systems they participate in, without being willing to interrogate them myself,” she said.

“I haven’t made this decision thinking my absence will be noticed, or a big deal, but as someone who believes in leading with your values, I just don’t feel comfortable being at an event that doesn’t align with mine.”

Salmin was described as a “a gonad stealing feminist witch” by one social media user after appearing at the 2024 Brownlows, after which she adopted the phrase and used it on her own profile.

“Of course, there are people within the sport who I love and respect (my partner being one of them), but that doesn’t mean the entire culture is above criticism,” she said.

“I think when it comes to the AFL’s attitude towards women and gender-based violence, there needs to be some serious change.”

Five Swans players have been banned by the club for the rest of the season for breaching club standards, including drinking and bringing women back to their hotel room, earlier this month. Victoria police are separately continuing to investigate an alleged sexual assault at the Melbourne hotel where the Swans were staying. No one has been arrested or charged and the five players have reportedly denied any criminal wrongdoing.

The initial response from the Swans and silence from the AFL after the alleged sexual assault was widely criticised as showing a lack of empathy towards the woman involved or those parts of the football community.

Salmin said she had enjoyed aspects of the Brownlow medal evening in previous years. “The Brownlow red carpet has become one of the occasions in my life where I get to properly play with fashion, talk about some of my favourite artists, designers and the art of upcycling.”

Moore captained the Magpies to the 2023 premiership, and is the son of a former Collingwood captain. He is a widely respected footballer who has twice been named as an All-Australian, and currently serves as the president of the AFL Players’ Association having succeeded Patrick Dangerfield last year.

Moore and Salmin appeared together in a social media video last year for Teach Us Consent, the respectful relationships organisation founded by Chanel Contos, in which the Collingwood player explained the toxicity of many male spaces.

“It is as a result of this culture of, like, blokes feel these pressures to act in certain ways,” he said. “It’s not serving guys. It’s clearly harming women, profoundly. So it’s pretty obvious to see those harms when you step back and think about it.”