"Free Talk" The cell phone that I dare not mute is also in our house
Quick Look
- The author tells the story of his mother, who is disabled and bedridden with dementia, and has an Indonesian caregiver at home, but she has to rely on mobile phone translators because of the language barrier.
- The retired father, who is over 70 years old, is responsible for driving to and from rehabilitation, accompanying him to medical appointments, communicating with doctors and sorting out medications.
- The author talks to his mother every day.
AI-generated summary
Why It Matters
The article quotes Lai Bizhen's masterpiece "A cell phone that dares not mute, seeing the other side of long-term photos" by "Freedom Square". The author is a freelance writer, telling the family care experience of a mother who was disabled and bedridden with dementia, was force-fed through a nasogastric tube, and was rehabilitated in the hospital three days a week. The family hires an Indonesian caregiver, but the caregiver cannot speak Mandarin, Taiwanese or English, and the family needs to rely on mobile phone translation to communicate. The retired father, who is over 70 years old, is responsible for driving to and from rehabilitation, accompanying him to medical appointments, communicating with doctors and sorting out medications. The author talks to his mother every day, even though her mother can no longer answer. The article points out that the long-term care system provides necessary services, but families are faced with a life that continues to operate every day. Coordination, waiting, communication and companionship cannot be fully included in the service hours, but they are also part of care.
A few days ago, I read Ms. Lai Bizhen's masterpiece "A cell phone that dares not mute, seeing the other side of long-term care" in "Freedom Square". The author's writing is true and relevant, and it describes the daily life of many Taiwanese families who have long-term care. It also made me feel sad while reading it. Because the cell phone that I dare not turn to silent is actually in our house.
When a person loses the ability to take care of himself, what really needs to be picked up is often the daily routine of the entire family. Pictured is a mobile phone. (AFP file photo)
My mother is disabled and has dementia. She is currently bedridden and force-fed through a nasogastric tube. She has to go to the hospital three days a week for rehabilitation. A year ago, she could still speak some simple words; this year, she has been completely unable to express herself in words. Whether it was caused by disease or other factors, we are not sure. We can only watch her gradually lose the ability to speak.
The family hired an Indonesian home care worker, but she did not speak Mandarin or Taiwanese. The previous caregiver could communicate in simple English, but this one couldn't even speak English, so we had to rely on mobile phone translation. Sometimes a sentence is translated back and forth several times, and we still don't know whether each other really understands it.
During rehabilitation three times a week, my retired father, who is over 70 years old, drives his mother, caregiver and wheelchair to and from the hospital. When the mother returns to the clinic, her father will accompany her. Because my mother could no longer speak the language to answer the doctor's questions, and the caregiver did not understand Mandarin, it was my father who finally communicated with the doctor. After returning home, my father sorted out the medicines and handed them to the nurse to administer the medicines through the nasogastric tube according to the schedule. The caregiver must take care of the mother carefully and must not neglect many things.
The entire family's daily routine and rest almost revolve around the mother's care.
The things I can share with my family are very limited, but I still spend a lot of time talking to my mother every day. She could no longer answer me, but I still had to think about what to say to her today, and I couldn't just repeat what I said the day before. I will tell her what happened today, encourage her, and let her know that the outside world is still there and that her family is still there.
Taken individually, these things are just daily trivial matters. But when it was all put together, I realized that for a family to make care truly work, someone needs to constantly handle the back-and-forth between medical treatment, caregiving, and daily life.
After the caregiver comes, it does not mean that the family members can really leave it alone. Someone needs to be picked up and dropped off during rehabilitation, someone needs to be explained to the doctor during follow-up visits, someone needs to sort out the medications, and someone needs to find a way to deal with the language problem. The picture shows foreign home care workers. (File photo)
After the caregiver comes, can the family really leave it alone? For our family, the answer is clearly no. Someone needs to be picked up and dropped off during rehabilitation, someone needs to be explained to the doctor during follow-up visits, someone needs to sort out the medications, and someone needs to find a way to deal with the language problem. Even if the mother is no longer able to speak, someone still needs someone to talk to her every day.
The long-term care system provides many necessary services, but what families face is not tasks that can be calculated separately, but a life that must continue to function every day. Those coordination, waiting, communication and companionship may be difficult to be fully included in the service hours, but they are still part of the care.
The cell phone that I dare not mute is also in our house. For us, it is not just waiting for a phone call, but also a reminder that when a person loses the ability to take care of himself, what really needs to be picked up is often the daily life of the entire family.
(The author is a freelance writer)
Open Questions
- What is the specific cause of the mother's disability and dementia?
- What are the contract terms and salary conditions for Indonesian caregivers?
- What specific support measures are there for the long-term care system in terms of language communication and family coordination?
- What about the author's family's financial burden and long-term care planning?
